Writers note:at memoir group,this entry and the one before it seem to have been undertaken in reverse order.Luck of the draw.But I've presented them here in this order for largely literary reasons which I hope will be obvious.Creative license.
There is really only one accident that comes to my mind these days.It was needless in the sense that my mother should never have been there.She loved her grandchildren,and didn't mind caring for them.But she didn't really need to be running halfway across the province of New Brunswick on a cold February day to pick them up for the week end.But she would never have said no.
It was only about ten minutes from home.A young man coming the other direction swerved into their lane and hit my mothers car head on.Both drivers died at the scene.It's said he may have fallen asleep as he was supposed to have had narcolepsy.At least thats the story my younger sister told.
My older sister recounted how she first heard about the accident when I visited for the funeral.She was sitting there watching the evening news,she said,and the accident flashed across the screen.Of course,you couldn't see it well.You never can see such thing clearly.She told me,she watched and said to herself"I'm so happy that my parents aren't out on a night like this.A few moments later,the police called.They'd called my other sister in Fredricton too and she had driven all the way back to Moncton.As she approached the accident scene she was detoured,and she must have known how bad things were.
Neither of my sisters knew how to reach me in Calgary as I had recently moved.My mother had the address written in an address book,but of course it was with her in the car.On Sunday morning two police officers came to my door.They had the look of soldiers coming to the door and I wasn't instantly aware of why I thought they looked like that.They said "you need to call your sister"And I did.She didn't have the message I was by now expecting.My father had been in poor health for years,so,of course,that's why she was calling.She said"there was a car accident and Mom didn't make it."To this day,I don't recall which of my sisters I called that day.
A few months later I made my one and only visit to the accident scene.It was a warm June night and my best friend from high school drove me there and made a u turn before pulling up to the place my younger sister had erected a white cross.I stepped down into the ditch and touched the cross and tried to think of what that night must have been like.It looked so different.I noticed a firefly at the foot of the cross as I was standing there,then another and another.When I came back up to get in the truck I looked back down into the ditch,where a glowing storm of fireflies circled that white cross.And I knew that God is good and merciful,that there is a place where we know nothing but his grace and loving kindness,and that my mother was there and that step from the side of that damnable roadside was very short and swift indeed.
No comments:
Post a Comment